The King of the Gaffers
¶ 1
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Oh, I’m the King of the Gaffers,
A cocky Portugee.
My team’s on top, we ain’t gonna stop,
There’s nothing botherin’ me.
¶ 2
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And I’ve an XL ego,
I’m too big for my boots.
So if I’m not your glass of port,
I could not care two hoots.
¶ 3
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Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, don’t wanna be like you, ooh, ooh.
Quite happy to be me,
‘Cos can’t you see that I’m unique?
¶ 4
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The Blues have played like clockwork
Since I strolled into town.
Thanks to clean sheets and one-goal leads,
I earned my golden crown.
¶ 5
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I can’t help being a big ‘ead,
It’s in my DNA.
I’m just like Frank Sinatra,
‘Cos I do things My Way.
¶ 6
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Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, don’t wanna be like you, ooh, ooh.
Much rather stay the same,
Still be José Mourin-ho-ho.
¶ 7
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Now Fergie, Arsène, Rafa,
They’re not a patch on me.
‘Cos I’m the King of the Gaffers,
I’m Football Royalty.
¶ 8
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The ‘Pool, United, Arsenal,
Should all throw in the towel.
‘Cos they won’t win the Title
As long as I’m around.
¶ 9
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So, ooh, ooh, ooh, don’t wanna be like you, ooh, ooh.
Why would I want to be?
I’m already me, and that will do. Ooh, ooh!
¶ 10
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30/9/05
Denys E. W. Jones
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