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v. Dolorosa

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 Fourteen stationed for the cross:

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 It was never a free kick! This ponce
of a referee is on auto pilot –
the defender is innocent as a lamb chop.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 This lot use Klinsmann as their roll model.
Their forwards dive deeper than Galilee
But this one’s riding on my shoulders.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 A whistle at last!
He pushed me to the ground!
What, no yellow card?

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 The wall has got to move back.
While we’re waiting I’ll give
a quick wave to my Mum in the stands.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 He’s on my back again!
Ha, ha, Simo’s just digged him in the ribs!
Now he’s dragging him off me.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 What the…? Some girl has just rushed
from the crowd to wipe the mud off my forehead.
She was wearing a T-Shirt with my face on it!

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 I’m knackered. Thank God it’s near the end
of the season. That winger’s been skinning
me all game. Now the crowd’s on my back!

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 But there’s that girl, smiling from the front row.
She’s got a couple of kids with her. A single Mum,
probably. She shouldn’t have run onto the pitch.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 Look John, mark Matthew and I’ll take care
of that centre forward. I owe him- he’s had me
on my backside three times today.

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 They said we’d have a mountain to climb
to win this one. For crying out loud!
I’ve just had the shirt ripped off me!

12 Leave a comment on verse 12 0 That bloke’s been trying to nail me
all match, so every time he has a go
I hold out my arms all innocent, like.

13 Leave a comment on verse 13 0 Watch out – here comes the cross!
That midfielder came out of nowhere!
It’s in the net. We’re dead and buried now!

14 Leave a comment on verse 14 0 Oh my back! I can’t move. Carrying that
centre forward all game has done me in.
They’re going to stretcher me off.

15 Leave a comment on verse 15 0 The St. John’s Ambulance man is wiping my face
with the magic sponge. I’m crossing over
the white line. I’m going down into the tunnel.

Notes

Eds – Will you please put this website link on my
footballpoets page. Ta.
http://scallyg.blogspot.com/

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/v-dolorosa/