World Cup 2010 – Day 1

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 South Africa 1 Mexico 1 (Group A)

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 The fans were blowing hard on odd-shaped cornets
As the competition started without hitch.
It sounded like a swarm of angry hornets
Was buzzing round the Soccer City pitch.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Like wasps descending on a picnic table,
The Mexicans were out to spoil the show,
Tormenting the Bafana, though unable
To land upon the hosts a fatal blow.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 But in the second half, Soweto local
Tschabalala crashed one o’er the line.
He sounded like a Chiffons’ backing vocal
And everyone agreed he was so fine.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 But then, in front of Pontius Pilate Blatter,
They went a little bit too far as hosts.
They served a goal up on a silver platter,
Bidding Marquez shoot between the posts.

6 Leave a comment on verse 6 0 The World Cup’s start, as usual, impresses,
Kicking off with quite a tasty trailer,
Though I’m unsure, as the tournament progresses,
How long I’m going to stick that vuvuzela.

7 Leave a comment on verse 7 0 Uruguay 0 Those Who Can’t Be Named 0 (Group A)

8 Leave a comment on verse 8 0 We had a plan in work to watch the football,
A fairly foolproof notion, it was claimed.
We would apply the science
To watch the Uruguyans
Playing versus Those Who Can’t Be Named.

9 Leave a comment on verse 9 0 We couldn’t get the match to play online, though,
And no-one knew too much about IT.
There was jeering, there was hooting
As we roundly cursed computing,
But not a shot in anger did we see.

10 Leave a comment on verse 10 0 Of course, as I was nominally most senior,
I was their prime target to be blamed.
Yes they threw me to the lions
When the unseen Uruguyans
Played the formless Those Who Can’t Be Named.

11 Leave a comment on verse 11 0 There’s only one thing saved me from a lynching
When gremlins in my pc came a-calling –
Though the fates were squarely stacked
I was rescued by the fact
That the match, it seems, was utterly appalling.


I understand that a certain T.Henry was howling with outrage when a handball in the Uruguay area wasn’t spotted by the ref late on in the game. Oh delicious irony.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/world-cup-2010-day-1/