Football Poets

“Don’t go to the match today, my son,
The journey is arduous, long and tiring.
I’d rather you stayed here at home with me,
And helped me to do that re-wiring.”

“Don’t go to the match today, daughter of […]

Are footballers paid a sensible wage,
Or do they earn all they can grab?
Do their agents grow fat, like plump, overfed cats,
In the Land, in the Land of the Yak?

Are the prices of match-tickets cheerful and […]

When the final whistle blows,
The match comes to a close,
The players head for bath or shower,
The fans to pub or home.

The journalists file their reports,
And tell in crisp, terse prose
Of targets hit and […]

Italy is there,
Germany is there,
Romania is there,
England, where are you?

Portugal is there,
Holland, Spain are there,
Turkey, Greece are there,
England, where are you?

Have you gone AWOL or Missing in […]

How much is the bus fare from Walton to Kirkby?
How long would it take to ride there on a bike?
Or what if you chose to roll up in a taxi?
Would you have enough change left to buy half a pint?

How much is a […]

When I was five or six years old,
My cute pet hamster died.
I shed a flood of bitter tears,
But somehow I survived.

I failed O-Level Chemistry,
Which is no cause for pride.
I flunked Geography as well,
Yet […]

Sometimes we play in Red.
Sometimes we play in White.
But it don’t make no diff’rence,
‘Cos we still can’t get it right

Let’s have a party.
Let’s have a party.
Let’s have a party.
What else do you suggest […]

Well, it was four forty-three,
Sure, you know what I mean –
Just two mins of normal time left on the clock.
So how could we hope to bag three points,
When we had not mustered a shot?

Then it was four […]

I never have been all that keen
On football on TV.
It’s not the same as being there,
As far as I can see.

And yet I almost changed my mind
One wet and windy night –
The night my television screen
Was fil […]

I liked those Fifties-style Shirts
Worn for the Derby-clash –
No sponsor’s logo on the front,
No player’s name on the back.
And numbers to eleven,
Not the modern mad mishmash.
I hope to see teams wear such […]

He wears the Blue and White with pride,
He’s beautiful and black.
His real name is Yakubu,
But we fans call him the Yak.

He’s often on the scoresheet,
He’s beefed up our attack.
Our prospects have looke […]

We haven’t won a Trophy for nigh on thirteen years.
We’ve had enough of moping and crying in our beer.
We’re tired and sick of taking stick from Koppites and from Mancs.
We want a Sugar Daddy to get us back […]

Some say the League Cup’s worthless,
Myself, I don’t agree –
It books you a place in Europe,
And a trip to Wemberlee.

Sure, the F.A.’s lots more lustre,
The Champions’ more class,
But it’s a damn sight bette […]

Oh, the Grand Old Duke of York,
He had ten thousand men.
He marched ‘em up to the top of the hill,
And we all know what comes next…

And the Grand Old Dame Britannia,
She gave poor Ireland Hell.
(But let […]

Though some say “yes” and some say “no”,
We all are Evertonians.
Though some say “stay” and some say “go”,
We all are Evertonians.

Though some were born on Mersey’s banks,
And some in distant shires, […]

When there’s no clouds in the sky,
When the sun is shining bright,
And my Team is riding high,
There I am.

There I am, there I am,
On the Terrace, in the Stand,
Singing, shouting, clapping hands,
There I a […]

I’m not so keen on New Year’s Day.
I know I ought to look ahead,
And trust the months to come will prove
Far better than those just gone through.
But all my thoughts are turned towards the past.
I focus on the […]

We are Genoa CFC,
Founded 1893.
We have won nine Scudettee –
Nine times Champs of Italee!

Got sent down to Serie C.
Bounced straight back to Serie B.
Twelve months later moving up and on,
Into the Top F […]

Here we come, down your way,
We’re gonna show you how the Game is played.
Hey hey, we’re the Toffees!
You might find us somewhat stuck up,
But we’ve good reason to be so,
‘Cos we’re in the Uefa Cup!

Her […]

“Shall I dance around a Maypole?
Take a first dip in the sea?
Shall I go and stare at paintings
In my local Gallery?

Shall I settle in my armchair,
Watch an old film on TV?
Shall I queue up for a ticket […]