• Don’t Go to the Match Today
    “Don’t go to the match today, my son, The journey is arduous, long and tiring. I’d rather you stayed here at home with me, And helped me to do that re-wiring.” “Don’t go to the match today, daughter of mine, Much better remain here with me. We’ll go to the centre and look round the […]
  • In the Land of the Yak
    Are footballers paid a sensible wage, Or do they earn all they can grab? Do their agents grow fat, like plump, overfed cats, In the Land, in the Land of the Yak? Are the prices of match-tickets cheerful and cheap? (Say, the same as a pint or Big Mac.) Or are they sky-high (and nobody […]
  • When the Final Whistle blows
    When the final whistle blows, The match comes to a close, The players head for bath or shower, The fans to pub or home. The journalists file their reports, And tell in crisp, terse prose Of targets hit and chances missed, Of Villains and Heroes. And just like Football, Life’s a game, With players, rules […]
  • England, where are you?
    Italy is there, Germany is there, Romania is there, England, where are you? Portugal is there, Holland, Spain are there, Turkey, Greece are there, England, where are you? Have you gone AWOL or Missing in Action? Are you banged up? Hiding out? On the run? Everyone else gets a slice of the Action, England, where […]
  • The Bus Fare to Kirkby
    How much is the bus fare from Walton to Kirkby? How long would it take to ride there on a bike? Or what if you chose to roll up in a taxi? Would you have enough change left to buy half a pint? How much is a bottle of Smirnoff in Moscow? Don’t know, never […]