• “Silence is a Virtue”
    It’s like going to a circus Doing the same thing every week You’re wonderfully ‘new-veau’ Sorry I can’t turn the other cheek. I’m not saying we should boo Or jump on the players’ back But all our loyal chants must be earned And today I decided to crack. Just polite applause at the final whistle […]
  • “On My Way To Worship”
    Today is Easter Monday I’m sitting on a bus There’s a girl on the next seat singing I don’t want to make a fuss. I wonder what she’d think of me If I sang Dulwich Hamlet songs out loud Rather than her “Hallelujah” As she joins her ‘God Squad’ crowd. My worship’s for later At […]
  • “Minor Soft Spot”
    I’m going to be late For the FA Vase Bus stuck in Forest Hill Behind a procession of cars. Mildly annoying Rather than doing my nut But it’s only Fisher So I just sit here and tut. Truth is I don’t mind The Bermondsey team We’ll never be the rivals They think to seem. They […]
  • “Wrong Message”
    Poor old BILL STICKERS Always getting the blame About to be prosecuted Even if it’s not him. Jesus Christ! It’s not Bill Who’s been plastering Lewisham With their message: Jesus Saves Sinners Repent and be Baptised Well if Jesus Is that good at saving Stop flyposting And start behaving Get in goal on Saturday Because […]
  • “Dear Lord”
    “Dear Lord” I’m terribly sorry for your loss Is there a worse time to die… On Good Friday of all days! Well apart from Christmas You expect everyone to be happy then. I’m gutted for you really. It’s put me right off my Easter eggs If only I’d waited until Monday When they’ll be half […]