The dog was more upset than me
That day you sneaked away
So much was left unspoken of
So much we had to say?
He whimpered as you closed the door
As your doc martens tapped he wailed
Though I tried hard to console him
T’was all to no avail!
As we sat there on the sofa
The poor thing look distressed
His mournful eyes in no uncertain terms
Told me he was depressed!
I turned on Sky to pass the time
To take his mind off things
As Richard Keys came into view.
He started blubbering!
As the camera focused on the crowd
Who was there but you
You’d sneaked out to watch the Spurs away
Whilst married to a Blue!
The ructions that we had that night
The air indoors turned Blue
But you explained in Black and White
What Spurs had done for you!
The dulcet tones of Martin Jol
You said had got you hooked
Especially in that interview
That he did with Garth Crooks!
You said that Tony from The Soprano’s
Reminded you of Jol
Plus the passionate acrobatics
When Robbie scores a goal
Each to her own I said to you
Later on that night
You’d rather Martin Jol than Mourinho
Are you sure you feel alright?
Robbie Keane where’s he been
I find that hard to grasp though
If you want passion with your goals
Go and check out Hernan Crespo!
The dog is much more settled now
Each time you leave the house
He knows that Spurs are just a passing phase
That soon will peter out!
You think you really know some one
Till they cause your heart to pain
Why can’t she come to Stamford Bridge
Instead of White Hart Lane?
The dog and me are true Chelsea
That’s forever to be sure
And her indoors? Though sadness irks
Still goes to watch the Spurs!