Poems tagged ‘Football Humour’
Football Forever
Football – on the horizon once more
Like the passing of the seasons
Football, like the clock on the wall
Ticking towards the passions of the
Teeming terraces, the fans return to
Their natural place in the scheme of
Things, wending their way, traipsing
Towards those timeless turnstiles
Heaving with hope, sun lit tunnels
At the other end of August to May
Refrain of old, collective chants and new
chanting the melodies that uncle and
Dad once intoned through cloth capped caps
Then mum once offered her knitted hats
Days when rattles and rosettes flashed
With transient pleasure then contorted
Faces of weather beaten defeat, oh the loss
But then the sudden transition to victory
On Cup Final day, the culmination of it all
But on this Saturday, Sunday and Monday
The random nature of times,
Dates, any chronological order who
Cares, play the Beautiful Game
At midnight and don’t wake up the
Neighbours because the supporters
Will embrace the hour yet again
In the first grievances of the world
Swirl when people bristle at the
Injustices groaning at ongoing
Discomfort on the theatrical stages
Of life, but hey we’ll always have
Football at any time of your choosing
The green carpet of August
Hostilities, then the millionaires
of football’s monied classes
Preside from on high while
Those below flourish their scarves
Cheering under the canopy
Huddled together, cold, warm,
The Bovril masses gathered, the sound
Of those who may never be quiet
For a single moment, bound
Together by vested interests
The fusion of blood ties, wit
And humour wandering through
Our fevered thoughts for
We were biased, devoted
To forlorn causes, relegation
And promotion, goals that
Lighten our moods
Because we were there,
Bitten fingernails to the
Bitter end, timeless and priceless
This is our time to win the League
Now or never time frames
Hopefully savouring the wine
Of triumphant times
Okay. Okay. Enough Already!
Outside Soho’s Bar Italia…
As I passed by there, yesterday
I’m sure I heard a suave barista say…
(Pray, excuse my Italian by the way),
“Calcio sta tornando a casa*
Problema per l’inglese?
E casa e Roma”.
Hmm…
Tout, “Two Together Tom?”, outside The Bridge
A seasoned ducker n diver since a slip of a kid
Recently scoffed, “All these games being called off,
Us trying to out-fox the cops, comes at a cost…
How’s a geezer s’posed to nick an honest few quid?
Heard the cops have had their over-time chopped?”.
Peace.
Try n stay sage, come what may, and have a right blinding day.
On…Form.
“Come on Micky, three to one?”,
“Kev, the bet is evens, son
You’ll win away at Spurs tonight, you always do
Bleating German, hardly through the door,
Leave me brassic, he gets top four
Still, midst your boss-eyed form, I nicked a bob or two”.
“Oh, come on Micky, three to one?”,
“Do that, I’ll be in the work-house son
I’ve a vision, and three kids, to feed indoors
Listen Kev, tell you what I’ll do, seeing as it’s you
Lay you an absolutely blinding nine to two,
Over at Spurs tonight, you get a pen, Jorgino scores?”.
“Okay Micky, fifteen sov’s at nine to two?
Plus…a score at threes, us winning, if I do?”,
“Okay, okay, you’re on, enough already, you’re proper getting on my wick.
I’m laying the German geezer, only stays twelve months,
Marina wields the axe, someone pushes him, or he jumps?
He’s got previous, for falling out with them, like you, trying to take the Mick”.
Peace.
Stay sage. Bode well.
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Welcome to Football Poets -- a club for all football poets, lovers of football and lovers of (alternative) poetry. Discover poets in every league from respected internationals at the top of their game to young hopefuls in the school playground.
Publish your football poems here and then discuss them with your team mates and fans. We're archived by The British Library, so your masterpieces are in the safe hands of a world-class keeper. What a result!
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Latest Poems
joe morris
16th May 2024
joe morris
11th May 2024
joe morris
9th May 2024
kevin halls
8th May 2024
joe morris
6th May 2024
joe morris
4th May 2024
Crispin Thomas
2nd May 2024
joe morris
28th April 2024
Richard Williams
26th April 2024
joe morris
25th April 2024
Crispin’s Corner
In Memoriam
Kick It Out & Christmas Truce
Latest Comments
29th April 2024 at 2:47 pm
Hi Denys,
Yes Richard Williams you’re a brilliant wordsmith, my friend. When I first saw your football poetry I thought it was the superb Guardian sports and music writer. I once had the honour of sitting next to Richard Williams while at the Independent on the sports desk. He writes about music and sport with immense knowledge and authority. I’ve read a couple of Richard’s books recently. Great writer rather like you Richard Williams the Pompey fan. Congratulations on promotion.
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28th April 2024 at 5:59 pm
Thanks Denys. Yes your replay poem was superb.
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26th April 2024 at 4:46 pm
Nice work, Joe. You were quick off the mark with that! Good one from Richard Williams too I see.
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25th April 2024 at 7:33 pm
Hi Denys,
Thanks mate. I’ll do it now.
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25th April 2024 at 1:56 pm
Thanks Joe,
you might like to write a poem yourself on the same subject…
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23rd April 2024 at 4:03 pm
Hi Denys
With you all the way on the abolition of FA Cup replays. What are they doing to the game?
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23rd April 2024 at 3:59 pm
Hi Crispin,
Yes sorry mate. Villa are still in Europe. Mistake rectified.
Cheers
Joe
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20th April 2024 at 12:04 pm
Hi Joe
Shouldn’t your title read your poem Farewell Europe England to everyone exccept Aston Villa ?
I know you mention them in your poem , but I do feel sorry for Villa re the national press .
Largely ignored. the hype was was all about Man City & Arsenal with a bit of a nod to the Hammers..but hardly a mention of Villa..
So well done to them
C
.
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19th March 2024 at 8:00 am
Hi Crispin. Chris Sutton on the radio has gone for a Chelsea v Coventry final. As we know anything can happen in the Cup, and I reckon we can go to the final.
We’re still in with a chance of the play offs too, so lots to go for.
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19th March 2024 at 7:41 am
Hey Kev
Let the masses drool over their odds on City v Unted Final, but who knows how pressure can hit.
Cov and Chels will be rightly labelled as having no chance..but hey …stranger things have happened..
so Chelsea v Coventry…that’s the Final for us!
Best
C
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