Football Poets

Pretty Much Over
When The Carling Cup was won
Unfortunately.

A footballer called Marty Calf
Said, ‘Bet you’d like my Autograph.’
When I said, ‘no’
Ballistic he did go
And said, ‘Are you having a laugh?’

‘You should be my devotee,
An autograph you should want from me
I’ […]

Watching your team lose in the pouring rain,
An offside decision you just can’t explain.
Walking home, upset, from White Hart Lane.
This is Football to me.

Dodgy food that is served at half-time.
Creating a m […]

Why can’t I wax lyrical about the Carling Cup?
I try to write a verse but eventually give up.
The performance was poetic and the victory was sweet,
Inspiration should come to me but a poem I can’t complete.
As a w […]

Oh what a sickening feeling
After feeling so proud,
To score the best goal ever
To have the Ref shout, ‘Disallowed!’

‘Why did you disallow it?’
I questioned the referee
He looked over in my direction
And then he […]

Mr Mundungo used to be
A positive and peaceful man.
He was always spoken about well
Helping others whenever he can.
He was very fond of people
And children especially
And he was highly regarded as
A pillar of the […]

Ray Davies and his brother Dave,
It seems an odd way too behave,
Alan Davies, No relation
Roger Daltrey and more of his generation.
Children’s Laureate, Michael Rosen
They’re also the team that he has cho […]

Miniature Melanie from Melton Mowbray
May have been small but she could really play
A mean game of football. She played in the park
With her friends, Michael, Matthew and her brother Mark.
More and More people […]

Frank Zachary Frumpet flew to France
To see his Favourite Football team play.
It cost him a lot of money
To fly over for a day.
It was the first leg of a European game
And his high hopes were held.
He’d been r […]

1, 2, 3, 4, 5
I really have to ensure
6, 7, 8, 9, 10
This Ball doesn’t hit the floor.
11, 12, 13, 14, 15
Keepy Uppy’s the game
16, 17, 18, 19, 20
The Record is my aim.

I’m using all my body parts
My feet, my he […]

There’s a green area opposite Tesco’s
Which is a reasonable size.
It is used, by me, to play football
Well me and the rest of the guys.

That is, that it would be,
But unfortunately today
We get there and find som […]

It is the Semi-Final of the Cup
My team is almost through.
The tension rate is mounting,
The rest is for me to do.
It’s my turn in the Penalty Shoot-Out
And it’s vital that I score
Because that will win us the gam […]

I went to a second hand shoe shop
They showed me a really nice pair.
Only been worn once by Ireland’s manager
And showed no sign of wear and tear.

I really wanted to buy them,
But then I changed my views.
I r […]

In our School we have a rule,
‘No Football to be played within School’.
But when Miss Trim popped out for a bit
We decided that we would ignore it.
We decided our classroom would become
A self made football sta […]

First Half:
Writing a poem is a bit like playing
In a football match, I’ll explain what I’m saying.
Before the first half the words emerge
From the tunnel, but at once there is a scourge.
There is no order, no rea […]

Running up and down the wing
Waiting for someone to pass to me,
Is probably where I started
To write this poetry.
I probably thought, ‘Well I’ve got
This un-interrupted time
To think of things like poe […]

It used to be about football
Not the way a footballer looks.
It used to be about football
Not vast sums for Ghost-Written Books.
It used to be about football
Not a trashy Reality show.
It used to be about […]

OK we have enough players
For two teams of eight.
We have jumpers for Goalposts
And a pitch we did create

We have all our soccer gear on,
The sun is in the sky,
But we are unable to play
And I will tell you […]

Hi,
Tumbleton United are looking far and wide
For new players, with the hope of forming a new side.
Would you like to play for us? You don’t have to be any good.
We’re told we should be selective and maybe we sho […]

It’s Saturday at ‘White Hart Lane’
The game is in full swing,
Until a man signalled to the Referee
That he was interrupting.
He then walked on to the pitch
With a megaphone in his hand
And said, ‘I’ve to tell you […]