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Crystal Palace Spell Check

1 Leave a comment on verse 1 0 We’ll start with chairman Arthur WAITE
Who built us our New Stand
Got us up to the Old First in 69
And had the Palace future planned.

2 Leave a comment on verse 2 0 Then our Jewish winger Mark LAZURUS
Who down the right would cause sheer murder
And big Roger HYNDE at center back
Who went by the steely name The Girder.

3 Leave a comment on verse 3 0 Alan BIRCHENAL we signed from Chelsea
Over a hundred grand it took
And we also signed their wing man
The Scottish wizard Charlie COOK
The HINSCHLWOOD brothers from New Addington
Martin and his younger brother Paul
And we gave a debut to Kenny SAMSON
Who as a teen got the England call.
We also had a tiny player who defenses apart he’d tear,
He was here, he was there, he was everywhere
His name was Vince HILLAIRE.

4 Leave a comment on verse 4 0 In the new century we had a manager
Named PULLIS —- but we referred to him as Tone
And he always wore a baseball cap
To cover up his dome.
So now I feel you wondering
what the hell is this about
But I’ll feed you one more manager
Before I let the secret out.
The Geordie nation didn’t have a prob
When they spelled out Alan Shearer
So how come Crystal Palace fans
Can’t spell Patrick VIERA.

5 Leave a comment on verse 5 0 See when you put the spell check on
And all these names are checked
You’ll find that all the Palace ones
Have been spelled out, in-correct.

29

Notes

Over the years I’ve been on Crystal Palace web-sites and am amazed at the amount of times fans have continuously misspelt the names of certain Palace players and managers. What makes it worse is that I am as guilty as the rest for committing this major crime. Even the mainstream press are not guiltless when it comes to wrongly spelling the name of our manager Patrick Veira. Ooops there I go again.
In the above poem every surname in capital letters has been spelled wrong. Here’s the correct list below.

Waite – Arthur Wait
Lazurus – Mark Lazarus
Hynde – Roger Hynd
Birchenal – Alan Birchenall
Cook – Charlie Cooke
Hinschlwood — Paul and Martin HInshelwood
Samson – Kenny Sansom
Hillaire — Vince Hilaire
Pullis —– Tony Pulis
and finally Patrick Viera which should be spelled Vieira. Even the BBC website got that wrong the other week.

Source: http://footballpoets.org/poems/crystal-palace-spell-check/