Football Poets

Mexico 1970

England the reigning champions, despite losing to Brazil,
Had reached the quarter finals and now had time to kill.

Sir Alf Ramsay got the squad together and gave them all a lecture
“I don’t exp […]

Ryan Giggs is all the rage
“Remember he’s forty years of age.”
To many Giggsy’s still the king
At forty he still rules the wing
Commentators drooling about his pace
“he got to forty with poise and grace.”
A […]

“ Excuse us Mr Finney,
we know later, you have a game,
but the outside toilet got blocked last night,
and there’s a problem with the drain.”

“I’ll make my way right over,”
said the great man from North End, […]

He was born in 1899, Bert Hislop was his name,
and from the time he kicked a ball,
he was a natural for the game.

From a tiny Yorkshire village,
where the men worked down the pit,
his father told him, you won’t […]

I’ve been kicked outside in all kinds of weather
“Don’t worry about her, she has skin that’s like leather.”
I’ve been kicked with in-steps, side- foots, and back heels
none of you know just how bad it feels.

T […]

I returned up north of the border,
to end up my football career
then like many a player of that era,
I became a publican serving up beer.

Nows many a night up in Scotland,
when the door of the pub I will […]

He’s called the Camberwell Carrot or the Ginger Zidane
now in the small town of Wigan, Ben Watson’s the man.

Coming on as a late sub, to try play his part
he planted a header past City’s Joe Hart

A defeat for […]

On any other Given night,
It would’ve been six to none
But the Russians hadn’t figured
On Shay and Richard Dunne

The Red machine came ploughing through,
As if they had a Given right,
But big Richard Dunne was […]

You can’t sit here, you must sit there,
football’s become too much to bear.
Stewards yelling—– “stay in your seat”
Chairmen dictating what we eat.
You can’t eat meat, or have a smoke,
the game has now becom […]

All of us at the club, would like to give our thanks,
for all that you have done for our us
as you brought us up the ranks.
We wish well for your future,
hope you do not take it personal
but the Board has all […]

The no smoking signs in heaven
have been taken down today,
as God informs St Peter,
that Big Mal is on his way.

“We’ll have to bend the rules a bit,
this man has such an aura,
find a cloud for his sheepskin coa […]

“Get this woman out of here,
its now become a farce,
but just to shut her up for good,
give her a touchline pass.”

Those were the words of old Bert Head
the boss of Crystal Palace,
who despite his weary tone of […]

To all you football scribbl–ers
a promise can you make
when writing about football
give Tuesday night a break.

You describe atmospheric Wednesday nights
at Tottenham’s White Hart Lane
but a cup thriller on a […]

A mighty man of six feet three,
and weighing fourteen stone,
when Palace struggled in the first,
John Jackson stood alone.

John (Stonewall Jackson
kept Palace up for years,
why he never got an England cap,
is a […]

This poem’s my opinion,
there’s no scientific proof,
some readers they will disagree,
and say it’s not the truth.

It’s about the greatest keeper,
who I have ever seen,
a giant of an Ulster man,
with the padded […]

They say a footballers life’s now slavery,
god I wish I felt their pain
like I did when tackled from behind
the reason I walk now with a cane.

Cortisone was my drug of choice
it helped me play each game
little d […]

Water teeming from the Russian sky
as two great armies struggle,
to stay afoot in their quest
for the spoils of war in Moscow
a place where western leaders
of the past dreamt of reaching
but never, ever, got past […]

At history lessons we’d be taught
of the Viking’s and the Saxon
and when teacher mentioned Romans
we’d all shout out Cliff Jackson.

“Who the hell’s Cliff Jackson?”
would yell the non pleased educator, […]

The appropriately named Stephen Ireland,
awoke from his hotel bed,
and was informed by coach Steve Staunton,
that his Grand- Mother was dead.
.
“ Your girl friend has just called us,
told us your granny passed a […]

When the wifes away Becks will play

They said that Becks was past it,
no more La Liga class,
only thing left in his armory,
was an occasional decent pass.

So with his place in Real’s first team,
under the c […]